1. Tom is picky about his onions
Who is this Tom and why does he need to control the situation so much that we have to let HIM pick the onions? Really, any onion will do Tom.
2. To legit to quit
Seems too simple to be effective, but I can’t think of any other reason why the googly eyes would be shaking!
3. Smile for the camera Bill!
Frank really did Bill wrong here. Frank is not Bill’s friend. Don’t be like Frank.
4. Make up your mind!
Are you Guy Standing or Guy Sitting? You can’t be both.
5. Best marketing strategy EVER
This is a real estate win right here. Realtors, take note and be ready to see your business soar to new levels. Also, invest in a taco truck because I personally would feel uncomfortable cooking $250 worth of tacos in my tiny kitchen.
6. How Nokia began…
Ever wonder how Nokia got its name? It was all just a gross misunderstanding of the situation.
7. That time the groomer screwed you
What is this sorcery? Like this doesn’t even look like a real dog anymore. I wonder if he is feeling very self-contious right now.
8. Snow doesn’t lie
Great detective work Susan, it does
9. That’s very extra of you
“Bro, my Italian restaurant is more Italian then yours!”
“Naw man, my Italian restaurant is Italian AS FUCK”
Check and mate.
10. Workman’s Comp
Frank is now in a wheel chair for life because instead of asking his boss for a new ladder, he used this passive aggressive display. Also, he didn’t finish what he started
11. Professional Guard Dog
This dog is going to create the opposite effect of keeping people off your property. I would gladly trespass for a chance to boop that snoot!
12. Men’s Life Expectancy Summed up in One Photo.
Seriously, who thought this was a good idea?
13. Willie Stroker
It’s not what you think, or is it exactly what you think? Either Willie Stroker is judging you.
14. You go to jail, you go to jail, EVERYONE goes to jail!
This is what happens when no one fesses up to the crime, EVERYONE gets punished. Personally, I thought just parents used that line but apparently this town is giving something new a try.
15. The more you know….
You have officially been warned, if you get bit by a snake, just find a nice hole to curl up in and succumb to the poison, unless of course you $150K+ sitting around. OR, the other lesson here is snake anti-venom procuring is a lucrative business opportunity.
